so I haven’t written in several months. October is the last time I wrote I think. I’ve since had my spc tube taken out. too many infections, it leaked, I just wasn’t happy with it. several months later I can say I kinda miss it. im glad I had it taken out but there were things about it I DID like. peeing standing up! I still had to wear pull ups but It was better than a full brief, which unfortunately im back to now. I just wish I had a body that was fully functional. I can deal with the loss of a leg. I can sort of deal with using a cpap at night (something else that’s also new), but bladder issues are a whole nother thing. im pretty sure I’ve gone through this before but my issues stem from when I fell down an escalator. I hit at just the right angle where I paralyzed my bladder. its been 6 years and I still have days where I hate my broken body. I have luckily come up with a routine and products that work for me. im grateful that this didn’t happen in the 60s or something where products just weren’t available. these days there is plenty out there so I can’t be the only one who uses them and has issues. I do feel alone though some days. but I suppose that’s just par for the course.